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Sunday, September 10, 2006

Logic - Not In The Budget

I'm beginning to suspect that even the simplest logic is extremely expensive in California. Perhaps there's a tax on it or something because how else can so many movies be easily destroyed by a simple, logical question? No, this isn't about the upcoming Transformers debacle, there's plenty been said about that already (and plenty more to come, you can be sure!), this is just about the general lack of forethought, even when the film itself is supposedly made for a more intellectual crowd.

I'm speaking of course about Star Trek: Generations.

Believe it or not, I've never actually sat completely through this film before tonight. Never saw it in the theatre, only caught bits of it on TV, but I've finally endured it in its entirety. And yes, it does indeed suck ass and may well be the worst film in the entire Trek cinematic collection.

I won't bore you with a synopsis, this isn't a review. Just one simple, logical question came to my mind while I watched this movie: If Soren just wants to get back into the Nexus, why doesn't he steal a ship and GO there? No need to research "trilithium" or build rockets that implode stars, no waiting around for the right time and place, just get a ship and fucking GO THERE. One simple question, with an obvious answer and I've destroyed the entire film. Couldn’t anyone at ANY point in production asked this question? I find that incredible.

Now I know there are people out there who hate people like me. Fuck them, I can't help it. I'd like nothing more than to sit in a movie theatre or plunk down in front of the TV and turn off my brain for 90 minutes or so and simply watch. God, that would be fantastic. Unfortunately, I can't shut my brain off completely. I can only leave it idling and when it gets confronted with a glaring flaw like the one in Generations, it's like getting a jumpstart from a lighting bolt. Often, I literally have my head shaken by the thudding impact of pure stupidity disrupting my otherwise blissful celluloid-induced trance state. And that pisses me right off.

Someday, I'll be watching a movie and when it finishes I'll think to myself, "Hey.... there was no logical error in that film, it made perfect SENSE!", at which point my eyes will roll back in my head and I'll lapse into a coma from the utter shock.

Well, it could happen...

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