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Wednesday, September 05, 2007

65 Million Years Later

Jurassic Park IV concept.. no really it isBlooodydisgusting.com reports the plot of Jurassic Park IV is, "... about the government who has trained dinosaurs to carry weapons and use them for battle purposes."

The above is not a conspiracy theory, joke, limerick, or even a children's toy line; it is the plot for the upcoming debacle Jurassic Park IV. Yes, Hollywood will never stop wiping its ass and putting it in multiplexes all over the world.

Instead of making fun of this "plot", which is far too easy, let me instead quote some of the better forum posts written by the target demographic Universal is aiming this drivel at:

"GOD DAMN IT, I DON'T CARE IF THE DINOSAURS ARE CARRYING TAMPONS.....I WANT MORE HUMAN CHOMPING DINOS!!!!!!!!!"

"a message to spielberg films: stop putting out crap. period. what's next? dinosaurs invade the gaza strip and eat palestinians?"

"Make them [dinosaurs] talk with BRITISH ACCENTS!! How's THAT for perfect?!?!"

"If you haven't got at least 30 IQ points on each and every person responsible for this risible story, I'd be very surprised."

"SERIOUSLY! This movie sounds so fucking whacky it HAS to be made!"

"dinos with machine guns strapped to them??? call me stupid, but i'm there!"

"it'll definitely have a space theme in it..... typical spielberg"

"Somewhere, right about now, Michael Crichton is slapping his billion-dollar forehead and shouting, "FUCK! WHY DIDN'T I THINK OF THAT?!"

"THAT SHIT JUST BLEW MY ASS AWAY!!!"


I could not agree with that last comment more.

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3 Comments:

  • Why workout at the gym when you can get the same from laughing so hard at the comments? I feel 2 years younger already.

    Wiping tears aside, just how superbad can it really get? A horror movie that's actually a comedy?

    Come on, it'll be grrr-eat! You'll love it. Serious.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Wed Sep 05, 10:53:00 PM  

  • You guys are nuts, this idea is 65 million volts of pure awesome!

    By Blogger CapnG, at Wed Sep 12, 05:52:00 PM  

  • Nuts to all of you, its a documentary. This is really what's happening at Area 51.

    By Anonymous Anonymous, at Thu Sep 13, 11:09:00 AM  

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